Golfers Are Coddled

Why do golfers need it quiet when the rest of the world's athletes play before screaming crowds and those athletes manage to focus and concentrate?

Picture the World Series of MLB: Game 7, bottom of the 9th, score is tied, 2 outs.   The batter walks up to the plate.   All the pressure on that batter. The fate of the game, the fate of BOTH teams, the fate of the entire season rests on his shoulders.  Teammates, sponsors, agents, millions of fans - all screaming at the top of their lungs:  "You suck!", "You can do it!", "Your contract is almost up!"    

He digs his shoe into the dirt, he swings his bat back and forth a couple times, he centers himself and manages to tune everything out and focus on a ball that is about to come hurling toward his head at the same rate of speed as a car on a freeway.  

And then there is the pro golfer.  All dressed up in pastel plaids, he strolls out onto the green.  He casually drops a tiny white ball down on the tee.  Choosing a club from a bag, he takes his sweet time lining up the ball and practicing his swing.  He decides when he will hit the immobile little ball. It isn't decided for him at 90 miles an hour.  He alone decides.  And this decision apparently demands absolute silence.

Just as he is starting his swing, someone in the crowd farts!  Gasp!  Security rushes over with guns drawn!  The fan is promptly arrested and escorted off the green.  

Golfers are babies.

Relaxation can be stressful

I've had reason enough to be tense lately.  So I thought I would look into the mysterious world of meditation.  Wanting to try something for free first, I hopped onto the website for the local library.  It took me to the Lakeland Cooperative website search screen.   I looked up 'meditation DVD' and it returned a few hits, displaying that none of the copies were located close by.  I would have to request that they be transferred to my library.  Instant gratification - denied.

I clicked on one that said it was in Idaho or Pluto or something of equal distance.  It said, "on shelf."  I clicked on "Place Hold."  A message was returned, "We don't have any copies."  Huh?  I just saw one!

Thinking I did it wrong (but knowing deep in my heart that I didn't), I tried it all over again.  KDL.org, 48 digit library card number, Lakeland Cooperative, MetCal (whatever that is), look up the DVD and again got rejected. 

I ended up trying three different ways and almost dissolved in to tears, swearing at my laptop and yelling, "it's there! it's there!"

I thought of the irony and just started laughing.  I was about to have a stroke caused by the sheer anger of trying to locate a DVD that would relax me.  Laughing about it made me feel better and that is when I realized that laughter - not meditation - is the best medicine.